Day 31

Well......I am off to MD/DE for 10 days of family festivities. Which I know for a fact will NOT be raw. :( I'm in such a good place right now, I hope this doesn't put me off tilt. But life is all about rolling with it, so I will make the best! I know MRV will be supportive. But it will be nearly impossible at my brother's graduation dinner/breakfast so my goal will be to just find something vegan! I am headed to work now, but when I come home, it's all about packing and then I'm driving my mom's place to sleep before out 9AM flight tomorrow. I am already longing for a restful night, I hope I can get it. I'm sure I will be posting during that time, but things are about to get crazy.

Day 28

My raw journey has empowered me in more ways that I thought possible. I have come to really understand that happiness is not the end-all be-all. And that I desire to eat raw when cooked foods are not taboo.

Today I ran 8 miles...on accident. I had a new route planned out, one that I had never even ran. But it was longer than I anticipated. It was so gorgeous today, and I was running through a neighborhood of $5 million dollar homes on the water. Nobody to bother me, wide streets, no traffic, great views, and a different perspective on my life. I'm so lucky to live the life that I have!

I bought some new running gear, so that's always a motivator. :)

This morning I also bought a new bike!! The biggest purchase I've made in my life! But the best! I ended up ordered the Fuji Finest 1.0 from the bike shop in my neighborhood. I test rode the Roubaix 3.0, which was a men's bike, but after I tried the women's specific, I just loved the way it handled and fit me better. However, I didn't love the Fuji Finest 3.0 because it was....purples. Bleh. But when they showed me the 1.0, I fell in love! It's two steps better and has a carbon fiber fork and Tiagra shifters, so it's made to potentially be a racing bike. I also left with a helmet and padded bike shorts, and when I came home, I ordered two jerseys and a pair of gloves on Ebay. And DANG! Bike gear is expensive! But whatever! Because I have the money and there are worse things I could be spending my time and money on...like alcohol and stupid shit that makes me fat and lazy. I don't think I would have gotten into cycling if I didn't go raw and inspire myself to get active. It's something I have wanted to do for a long, long time because I do love riding.

Today was a really awesome day! Woke up naturally around 7:30...went to the store and Target to exchange some things, get some things I need and presents for my brother and sister. On Wednesday, I have a flight to Baltimore for my little brother's graduation from the Naval Academy. I remember sending him off on I-Day four years ago...I know it hasn't been easy but I am SO proud of him, I wouldn't miss it for the world. And then he moves to Pensacola to be a pilot! We are going to plan some rides together.

My goal this weekend is to eat all the watermelon. Ha, what an awful goal! Just had a huge fruit smoothie, now I'm gonna lay down, I'm pooped, read my vampire love story book and chill out.  What a perfect day. :)

 

Sunshine dress!

 

Love this ball of fur :)

 

She's smiling....

 

My NEW toy!!! 

2012 Fuji Finest 1.0

 

New running shorts

 

Things are shaping up back there, lol

Day 24

Blah! What a poopy day.......weather wise, that is. It's been cloudy, gloomy and rainy aaaaalll day. The weather seriously affects my mood, I hate to admit. But I just didn't feel like doing much after work today. I was raw up until I got home. Watched some TV, now I'm gonna take a nap, listen to the rain and snuggle with my cat. Rain, rain, go away!

Day 24

Another good day. However, my run...not so great. It started out really good, but about halfway through a 6.4 mile run, I just pooped out...ran out of gas. I was feeling physically tired and hungry and I had a sore stiff neck. I tried to stretch the kinks out, but I ended up walking about a mile but I got my second wind the last 1.5 miles. Finished in 1 hour 11 minutes and by the end, I had no energy. It wasn't cloudy like it was yesterday, but who am I to make excuses?

I'm pretty sure I picked out the bike I want to buy! 

My (hopefully) new road bike! Fuji Roubaix 3.0 with aluminum frame and carbon fiber fork...can't wait to hit the streets! And only 20.7 pounds!

I'm not bored with running, but I do think it would be fun to take up another active hobby, meet some like-minded peeps and just enjoy life!

Okay. So let's be honest. Tonight I have every intention of eating  a sub from Jimmy Johns. Vegan, of course. I am experimenting with the idea of, "its okay to eat cooked when I want to, to prevent me from going ape shit crazy." We'll see how this works out! Raw for the first part of the day, cooked at night....if I'm feeling like it. I think I can live with that? I just want to find a balance between feeling good, eating what I want and being physically fit.

Day 23

Boy, it feels SO good to be back!! I bought a ton of groceries last night, just lots of fruit so I was well stocked today, which meant I was in a good mood! Work went by really quickly. I enjoy work, but it's never fun when time just drags by. I played kickball last night and our team won 9-1! Last season my team was not good. We have new people and are doing better, though I doubt I am a contributor to that. But I enjoy it!

I am thinking about trying the Insanity workout program............just because. I did P90X for awhile and really liked it...and I've heard good stuff about this program. 

I got my Nike SportWatch today! And let me just say.......it's AMAZING!! Holy smokes, I absolutely love it! It's so SIMPLE and EASY to use! Nothing fancy schmancy about it. It logged my time, calories burned, distance and even my route. The entire time I could see how far I had gone and what my pace was. I hovered around a 9.30 /mile which isn't bad considering I haven't run in about a week and I can only get better from here on out!! I came home and uploaded it to NikePlus and it showed a map of my run, and a minute by minute log of my pace. It's really quite amazing! I always wonder how far I've actually run, I use the site www.mapmyrun.com to map it out before hand, but now I have it in the watch PLUS calories burned! I burned about 583 calories, ran 4.5 miles in 45 mins. How awesome!

I felt really, really good the whole run, and I had energy at the end too. My legs felt strong, its awesome how quickly raw food can turn things around for me. Oh, that and passing by lots of cute guys along the way. That always helps! Ran in my brand new snazzy shoes today, and DAMN they are bright, LOL! You could see me coming from a mile away! I think they make me run faster! Hehe. But I felt TOTALLY in my element. This was the way life was meant to be lived. I know my purpose. I finally know true happiness.

Came home, made a smoothie, and now I'm downloading new music to the Pod. YAY! I just feel SO good! I'm back in it, my run was awesome, I feel really motivated. AND I'm going to buy a road bike this weekend, it will take about half of my savings, but what's money? I'd rather have a bike than numbers in the bank. I can't wait to hit the road and start riding. I've been doing some research online and I think I know which one I want, but I'm still gonna go out and test ride some on Saturday, I have no plans, loveeeeeeee that.

 

Custom painted "new" antique coffee table :)

 

Lovely flower I found on my car this morning before I left for work......from my neighbor :)

Quack!

 

I'm glowing! LOL

Ooooooooooooo, oh ya, and getting a new tat when I go back to MD/DE in two weeks...keeping it a secret until I actually get it, but it has everything to do with this joy in life I have....and NO, it's not going to be a picture of a banana :D

Day 22

Motivation! Shall we discuss?

I have been searching for it lately.

 

I went shopping for road bikes on Saturday, and let me just say, I'm pumped up!! I got to ride one, I am going back to test drive more next week, but I can't wait to own one and start riding!!

 

This crazy raw fit 80/10/10 girl, Freelee is always inspiration!!

 

Look at her!! She's been LFRF for over 5 years, before she was quite chubby and bloated, a little bit the way I'm feeling now. I would LOVE to look like her!

 

Amazing!

 

My vegetarian friend Kristi and I went to the club to see Nadia Ali!

 

So much fun!!!

 

I found this picture on Facebook...........can we say INSPIRATION???

 

This is what I look like. :( Ha, more motivation.

 

Okay, so this was NOT motivation. I went to a Meetup event with a bunch of girls, and this was there. I didn't touch anything, but only because everything had either cheese or meat in it. I won't touch that stuff. So that saved me!

It's actually been a pretty horrific week for me all around. I have not been eating raw and thus NOT feeling good AT ALL. I feel like I have a giant rock in my stomach. I had a half-assed run on Monday, but the rest of the week I just came home and ate and watched TV. Ahhh! I had ZERO energy to do anything, including going to the grocery store to buy fruit. I just feel sluggish and tired.

It seemed like the week before when I was motivated and running was just a distant memory. But I'm going to buy a road bike next week and start cycling because I just love to ride! It's something I've ALWAYS wanted to get into. I can't believe it's taken me so long to make a move. It excites me to think about it, and to start training for a sprint Triathlon : Swim ¼ Mile, Bike 10 Miles, Run 3.1 Miles. An Olympic Triathlon : Swim 1/2 Mile, Bike 20 Miles, Run 6.2 Miles. Start small and work my way up! 

I'm also volunteering for the Tough Mudder obstacle course in December! I'd like to do it, but I think I will just volunteer to check it out first. They have the events all over the world, and I think that sounds like AMAZING fun!! Okay! So lots to look forward to! Seriously, I need it. I was up til 5 AM this morning at the club, yikes, and I slept in til 2 PM. I haven't done that in MONTHS. It doesn't feel good. I am playing kickball tonight then going to the grocery store on the way home. Tomorrow I start again at day 1!!! The record to beat is 2 weeks!

Day 20

Holy smokes! Day 20! I swore I would be completely honest on this bloggy, so I am going to give it straight up. I have not been in a good place all week. I guess I've got some serious issues with food and it's been hard for me to focus again. But I will. I need these bad feelings to remind me how much I love raw foods. I can't take for granted how awesome it is when I am in my element, eating raw, running and just feeling in good spirits overall. I am not feeling that right now and everything I do is just to bring me back to that place. Tomorrow is another day...

Day 19

Hiya! I will admit, I didn't try at all today. I don't understand myself sometimes. I know what I want, but sometimes I am just lacking in the motivation department, serrrrriously! I didn't eat raw at all today, and of course, I feel like a total sloth, I'm sooo sleepy and sluggish. But I need days like these to remind me to get back on the wagon! I just wanted to come home and sleep. Blah. I am thankful that tomorrow is a new day to start fresh.

My friend's brother sent her 4 pairs of beautiful new running shoes, and she gave me two pairs!! I'm such a lucky girl!

 

How is this for some motivation? Hecks ya!!

 

And this!

And this!!!!!!

 

Oh, and I also bought this for myself, sort of a impulse buy, but I've wanted one for awhile and this did get good reviews and I know I will love it!

Yay for motivation!

I've got a fridge full of strawberries and watermelon for tomorrow.

It's weird though, ever since I stopped eating my salads, I've been off my game. I wonder if that means something?? 

Day 18

I felt like a bowl of jelly on my run today. For about a mile, I just had the word, JELLY! JELLY! JELLY! going through my head until I realized how stupid that was, so I switched it up to, STRONG & CONFIDENT! That got me through the next few miles. Man, it's so easy to fall off the wagon! I took yesterday off, but did I really just run 6.2 miles on Sunday morning?! My feet and ankles were hurting a little bit and I stopped with about 1 mile left in a 5 mile run. I stopped on top of the bridge and spent a few minutes looking out over the water and the palm trees, and I just went WOW. Why haven't I stopped and taken a look around before? Because it's so freaking beautiful where I live! I live in a tropical paradise! I'm so so lucky!! I enjoyed my walk back thoroughly. But I did see one girl who was really into her run and I was slightly jealous because I wanted to be her! I normally am her, I was just jealous at that moment.

I'm realizing how evil I think cooked food is. Maybe my mind is warped, but my feelings can't be wrong! But I DO KNOW that cooked food does not enhance my performance or make me feel very good in the long run. I've got to step it up again. I am really grossed out by my fat stomach, that needs to GO. I am going to start P90X again! And I am going to get lots of watermelon in the morning to eat at work. I need to focus and get my mind right because I want to be strong and invincible and like a machine!

Day 17

Where does time go...tell me?! I've learned a lot about myself these past 17 days. I have not been raw the past 5 days. I can't really say that I have been feeling terrible, but I feel as if I wasn't raw for those 13 days before that. I also hate keep track of my daily activities such as eating. I convince myself that I need to have rigid structure in my life or everything will go to shit. Well, I am pretty sure it won't if I let loose. 

I ate raw all morning and afternoon. No yucky salad, instead glorious watermelon and strawberries. I could eat that ALL DAY LONG. I am really starting to love my job. It's so exactly what I enjoy doing! I am independent and get to work alone, take breaks whenever I feel like it, and I don't have a lot of pressure from above. I look forward to going to work. But I also look forward to coming home! 

I thought about running after work....until I thought about getting sushi instead and that won out. The sushi I get is really fabulous and completely vegan. Not raw. But low in fat. Wanna hear something crazy? I just registered for a series of 4 half marathons this fall/winter! They are races that I have ran before and volunteered with before, but I've never done all 4 races in the series. That's 2 complete marathons people!! I'd been wanting to do if forever, and I just decided to commit last night. As long as I don't turn into a fat lazy slob, I'll be fine. And my goal is to finish under 2:00. My last time was 2:25...not great. I ran my 10k at a 9.30 minute mile...so if I can keep that up, I'll be just slightly over 2:00 at 2:03, and I KNOW I can beat that!! The first marathon is October 28, which will be fun! I don't celebrate any holidays, but I think I will still wear some crazy neon spandex or something for kicks. I will for sure be eating raw 100% a few weeks before, and the next race is December 9, which is great so I don't lose my motivation over the holidays, just being surrounded by it all. I love having goals and something to look forward to. Once something ends, I must start something NEW!

Sushi was good, but I am ready to eat raw again tomorrow. I have a pineapple, strawberries and lots and lots of good old rainbow juice to fill my belly!

Yummy rainbow juice! This will last me one day.

So tired right now, time for bed. It can only get better!

Day 16

Eating out of sheer pleasure...what a concept! But one that has taken me awhile to figure out. Last night I went food shopping and bought only the foods I love. I bought watermelon and strawberries and bananas! I didn't buy any lettuce, I just couldn't imagine eating anymore of that, at least right now.

This morning, I ran a 10k race for police appreciation. It was fun and not strenuous for me because I'd been training with higher mileage all last week. I woke up and had a big bowl of watermelon. After the race, I had a roll....okay maybe two or three or four but I enjoyed them, and I didn't walk away feeling icky. I need to find this balance between food and fitness and feeling good about myself. I am not liking my stomach so my friend Jen and I are going to start doing an ab workout together. And I am going to eat raw either 2/3 of the day, or 5 days a week. I haven't figured that out yet. I will let the pictures do the talking today.

 

I ate this, whatever! It was SO good.

 

My favorite place in the world

 

Favorite food in the whole world

 

Chillen with kitty

 

Another favorite food

 

Go Shazz, go!

 

Day 15

Wow lol, lets wipe yesterday off the books, shall we?! Just wow. Moving forward!! I did not eat raw yesterday, but it was a very good meal, even though I did of course feel horrible after. Still now regrets. I even had a beer with my friend downtown, but it tasted AWFUL and I felt so full and disgusting after one. I am only human, and I will not consider that day a failure because I learned some important lessons. One being that I really do dislike drinking alcohol, and two, I need to eat what my heart desires and nothing less!! I am not feeling lettuce, red peppers, broccoli, avocado or mangoes. No thank you. Today, I had tofu scramble for breakfast at the morning market. And now all I want is to eat an ENTIRE juicy watermelon, strawberries and pineapple. YUM! This raw journey isn't all about eating raw, but about living a vibrant and satisfying life and finding a healthy balance between feeling good and eating. I don't want to live a restrictive life chock full of taboo foods that I can't touch. I want to NOT desire cooked foods, and I've also learned that I can go weeks without it, but when it does come along, I can't fault myself or consider it a failure. I'm back on the horse day, with a vengence. I might even throw in some P90X just to boost things up a little. I'm not losing hope and I am far from being defeated. 

Loving that it's the weekend! Cleaning house, going grocery shopping and Sheryl Crow tonight at Vinoy Park!!!

Day 14

I have not been in a good place the last 12 hours. I feel weak, I have a horrible headache and I am very irritable. Even when I ate cooked foods I never felt this awful. I was doing great, I ran 7 miles after work, I felt really good. But I was very hungry afterwards and I ate an avocado. I immediately felt very very sick, light headed and nauseaus....I never feel that way. I went to hang out with my neighbor next door and I felt like I was drunk. I am getting tired of eating so many bananas. I NEVER had headaches until last night and I woke up with it today. I feel absolutely awful and I wish I could eat cooked foods. Real food. Every little thing is annoying me and I feel bitter. The other day, I screamed out loud in frustration because the water was taking so long to warm up. This happens all the time and I never get that annoyed. I am normally a very peaceful person. I am tripping over cords, rugs and being abnormally clumsy. I know I should eat more, but I am not finding joy. 

The longest I've ever went raw was 2 weeks. Today is day 14. If I wasn't running a race on Sunday, I would eat a huge cooked meal. I am not sure how much longer I can take this awful feeling. I might go back to eating 1 meal a day cooked, just so I can start to feel normal again. If I am not finding joy and feeling good why am I doing this? I don't eat raw to feel this crappy. I can eat Taco Bell and feel equally crappy. I am feeling thinner, but if the scale hasn't budged, what's the point? I am feeling very negative now. My mind is very dark. It's Friday and I want to eat something cooked. I even want beer. Even though I won't touch that stuff anymore. I want to relax and let my mind flow. I hate these black thoughts. I don't have any food to eat today except mangos. I don't even have a single banana. I don't know how I am going to survive the day. Drink a lot of water and just keep moving I guess. This is not good. I want to feel normal and bright again.

Day 13

I desperately need to go food shopping. But I just haven't felt like it and I'd rather go running after work. I am hoping I can hold off until after work tomorrow. Today was a very light day of eating. 5 bananas and the last of my juice all day today. Chocolate milkshake before my run. 7 mile run today and now a fruit smoothie plus avocado dip with lettuce. Late night munchies with two of my favorite ingredients: corn and avocado!
Creamy Corn Dip
two corn cobs
1 avocado
1/4 red bell pepper
blend until smooth and dip with romaine boats!
Mmmmmmmmm!

I'm exhausted. Bleh. Not much to talk about. I'm craving Tijuana Flats majorly. But I know raw foods make my runs effortless, like night and day. My 10k is on Sunday. I just need to eat and get through this. I'm so tired of being hungry all the time.

Got the attention of a cutie playing beach volleyball, he waved at me as I ran past. I didn't think he was waving at me and I was in my zone so I just ran by. But after my run, I walked back to the courts and made small talk and watched while he played. He didn't really chat me up much more than that, but I know he plays most Thursday evenings and he was cute so I might see him again.


 

PS. I could eat a freaking horse right about now. You know what I mean!